Oh it's been ages

Haven't blogged since last two weeks of annual leave and here I am another two weeks off and finally get some time to blog again.
So erm what's been occurring? Well not much, work is up and down, L has retired and I miss her, she was very supportive and I would not have got back to work if she hadn't helped me. Some new people have started and they are great.
I found a PTSD support link on Twitter, that posted a link about research suggesting creativity good for mental health. I guess we all know that really but it's given me the boot to make more time for fiddling about in my studio. I made some bunting for this summer's O'H wedding and then I made some for our tent. Now i'm turning out reversible tote bags, it's fun and takes my mind off things. Also people willing to buy them from me so house not buried in stuff I've made!
Last weekend we went to Norfolk to celebrate Si's 40th, it was a lovely few days, the Smith's joined us, it was so good to see them all, the new baby is delicious, her head is perfect, Blobbie would have adored her.
I struggled a bit with all the people and talking but it was great, I couldn't have done that last year.  Poor T has a cold this half term, good job I'm off because the snoring is shaking the house and sleep isn't easy.

So tired

I haven't slept properly in days, the limited amount of sleep I was getting has reduced since starting phased return, little wonder, some of my "mates" at work can be rather brutal. I obviously have a large sign over my head that says "kick me while I'm down"
The carnival college course is fab. I'm enjoying being creative and can get lost in the sketchbook stuff for hours. Some of the teachers on the course can be a bit miserable.
Wish I could think of another job I could do other than nursing, i'll wait for inspiration to strike.

Couldn't sleep last night at all, so got up early and took Bill for a long walk around the Bill. Saw so many birds it was great, my phone camera isn't great but that's a snap of some Oyster Catchers and one busy Turnstone flipping seaweed in the air and keeping out of the way of the waves. Max had dentist today, I nearly fell asleep in the waiting room! Bought baby Joseph an outfit, it took us ages to decide, they were all so cute! Then I went to the sewing shop and bought some lovely fabrics to do something creative for Easter, don't know what yet!

Sunny day

Better day today, T at home, although busy writing reports. A bird in the garden that I couldn't identify this morning, I think it was a Black Cap, anyway he was very happy on the seed/berry cake!
While Ireland played rugby and T sat hunched and tense on the edge of the sofa, Billy and I enjoyed a walk around the Bill in the sunshine. A naval ship was firing, I don't know what, just off the coast, it made a very loud noise and 4 plumes of smoke hung in the air for a long time after, the men in the coast guards hut were looking too. I took a pic with my phone but you can't really see much. The gulls were flying so close to the cliff edge it felt as if you could almost touch them, I didn't try, the rocks beneath are not very kindly looking. Plenty of sea birds on the rocks, busy diving in and out of the sea, so amazing to watch.
Max called T to discuss the rugby, he's home tomorrow and it sounds as if he's had a fantastic week away.
Have started another jigsaw this evening and really must try and get into the studio tomorrow, felt a bit like walking under a heavy weight today. Perhaps after yesterday or a night of little sleep this feeling is inevitable and I should make more realistic goals. Tomorrow's another day!

Sunday

Well Max safely dispatched, crawled into bed but didn't sleep a wink until after 5, mind was a whirl or anxieties, none of which seem important in the day. My therapist, Tonic, suggested a night light to turn off the primitive part of my brain that was alert for danger, but it hasn't really helped much. I'll try anything, even cut down my tea and chocolate intake, which is my life blood!
This morning T and I went to the Blue Fish for breakfast, its a fantastic, friendly place to eat great food on Portland. We love it there. There was an irritating table of Rotarians sitting behind us and I tried not to listen and get irritated by them but it wasn't very easy. We booked ourselves a table to celebrate Valentine's. T is always so romantic, I've had roses and pink champagne in the past, last year was wonderful because we were away with my family for my 40th and Tom sent red roses. He is wonderful and I know how lucky I am to have him in my life.
I'm of to Mum and Dad's in a bit. Mum is taking two days annual leave and we are going to look at family photos and chill together. I'm looking forward to it. They are very supportive and I love being with my Mum, Billy is coming too but I will be missing T.